vividideas

Thoughts, Ideas, Recipes, Tips….

How are girls any less? April 10, 2011

Filed under: Inscrutable Indians — jkomal @ 9:09 pm

Even today in India, there is a social stigma when a girl is born into the family. This may prevail in many parts of rural India but is the case different in urban India? Unfortunately no, even if parents are happy when a girl is born, even if parents send their daughters to good schools and college, ultimately when it comes to marriage everything goes backward. Even educated parents of educated daughters, in today’s times, have to give dowry to the boy’s family during the marriage and all the festivals and important occasions thereafter.

Educated parents of educated boy are no less, they always have this expectation that the girl’s family have to make them feel important and give gifts on every occasion or the other.

But why does such thinking still exist in today’s modern India? Why should there be such expectations? Why does the boy’s family feel as if they are doing a favour to the girl’s family by getting their son married to someone else’s daughter? In what way is the girl less?

Isn’t she as educated as the boy? Isn’t she working and financially independent? Isn’t she contributing to the family’s well being? Isn’t she the soul of the house and the family? Then why this difference, why this partiality?

It is a shame to see how on weddings, the girl’s family have to flaunt the amount of gold they are giving to their daughter and to the boy’s family members. It becomes a matter of prestige. What is so prestigious about this whole deed?

If the parents want to give their daughter something it is between the parents and daughter and not for everyone to see. Why then, does the mother in law want to know what is being given?

Also, why is there an expectation that the girl, after marriage should set all her loyalties only to the boy’s family? Why shouldn’t she help her parents in anyway (financially, physically or emotionally). Her parents did everything to bring her up and provided for her, so why shouldn’t she be there for her parents? Why is it looked down upon if she is still close to her family? Isn’t unfair? There is no such expectation from the boy’s side. In fact, the boy has to provide in every way to his parents, it is his dharm so why shouldn’t it be the dharm of the girl as well.

It saddens me to see that even in todays so called modern India, things hasn’t changed as much. We should all take a step to bring about this change. We must boycott such thoughts and deeds in every way possible.

Statistics of dowry deaths that occur in India:

 

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